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It’s happened. Hell’s frozen over. There’s a new Fortniteadd-on that — aside from the most annoying people on social media — we can all universally agree is more weird in a bad way than it is weird in a good way. If fact, the thing that arriving is downright bad. It’s the Tesla Cybertruck.
Yup forget about all the good — if a bit strange — juju that’s arrive in Epic Games’ huge thing recently in the form of Fallout’s T-60 power armour and a Metallica concert you could take your dad to, assuming you were also open to teaching him the griddy.
As announced via X, or Twitter as real people still call it, the platform of choice for the world’s most irritating billionaire — and think of the ground that covers — Tesla’s Cybertruck is coming to Fortnite.
What’ll it be doing? Well driving around I suppose, as the trailer below kinda demonstrates, if you don’t watch it. It shows Fortnite mascot Fishstick engaging in a tug-of-war with a bunch of different vehicles, and, because this is a video game, the chain breaks before the Cybertruck can lose by starting to rust, or just falling apart like one of Wile E Coyote’s ACME contraptions.
Then again, once he’s free, Fishstick does end up flying away at breakneck speed, so we can probably assume the accelerator pedal’s fallen off and left the ugly autombile stuck at full speed. This virtual Cybertuck is in need of recalling, and we can only hope Fishstick managed to hold the brake pedal like his little life depended on it and save himself from mowing down an innocent gang of Geralt of Rivias flossing and dabbing away in a school zone.
If nothing else, at least there’s a surefire way of telling whether the person that’s killed you is an absolute weapon. Or a child that doesn’t know who Elon Musk is, in which case it’s your duty to fire up voice chat like it’s the old Modern Warfare days and deliver an impassioned lecture on the subject of inherited wealth turning people into d***heads.
Only you can help save our future. Even if it’s already clearly doomed, because the Cybertruck – in spirit at least- has already made it into Roblox.