Opinion: No, Zelda: The Minish Cap’s Worst Sidequest Isn’t The Kinstones

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Zelda: The Minish Cap Kinstone
Image: Nintendo Life

I’ve banged the Minish Cap drum so many times by this point that my adoration for Link’s littlest adventure is old news. With today marking 20 years since this GBA gem landed in Europe, it felt too easy to sit down at my desk and gush over the tight six-dungeon structure, the brilliant puzzle design or the somehow still under-discussed soundtrack. I’ve been rambling on about these for the past two decades and a big birthday like this deserves something special.

It’s obvious what we should do, really. Let’s talk about the parts of the game that suuuuuck.

For many, that will set the Kinstone alarms a-ringing. This Hyrule-wide fusing quest has earned quite a reputation over the years as the key sticking point in an otherwise stick-free adventure, and sure, it has its problems. I too wish there was some way that you could log the NPCs you are still yet to fuse with and some kind of ‘Fuses Remaining’ counter might help things feel a little less endless. There are some out there who enjoy it, though!

But, for all its inconveniences, it has its fair share of rewards, too. I’m tired of Kinstone fusing being dragged through the mud like some kind of Korok Seed-level event when, in actuality, it’s a fun little mechanic that does nothing more than give the people of Hyrule something else to talk about.

If we really want to talk about Minish Cap features that deserve a one-way ticket to the Dark Realm, then let’s shift the focus to Carlov and his blasted underground gambling ring — or the Figurine Gallery, to give it its proper name.

Zelda: The Minish Cap Figurine Gallery
Welcome to hell, Link — Image: Nintendo Life

I’ve played through The Minish Cap more than any other title in the series by this point, and this jolly figurine maker and his stupid little smile always rubs me up the wrong way.

Look, I know that the figurine collection is an entirely optional part of the game, and I could just pretend that it’s not there. But every time that smug little grifter opens his shrub abode, I can’t help but be pulled in. Like a fool. For those of you fortunate enough to have avoided Carlov and his web of lies, allow me to provide a brief refresher.

After Link infuses the Earth and Fire Elements into his blade and claims the White Sword, the Figurine Gallery opens in a bush in Hyrule Town. Inside, you meet Carlov, a master figurine maker (who made his debut in Wind Waker). He grants you one of his famed statues in return for some of the Mysterious Shells you’ve picked up throughout your journey.

There are 130 figurines to collect in total, each depicting an NPC, enemy or boss from the game, with an additional six to unlock once you’ve defeated Vaati.

Sounds neat, right? Well, I haven’t got to the best part yet. Figurine Gallery sales operate through a strict gacha system and yes, you can get repeats. The more Mysterious Shells you pour into the Figure-Dispensing Machine, the higher the chance you’ll redeem a new design, but once you’ve ticked 80/90/100 options off the list, anything lower than a 100% pull rate can start to feel like a waste of time.

Speedrunners have found the knack for it, of course, and there are some ways that you can exploit the RNG by only betting one Shell at a time to get the best value for money — The Plant Commander explains just how busted this quest is in great depth. But gosh, what a time sink! It’s not even like Wind Waker’s Nintendo Gallery or Tears of the Kingdom‘s Monster Sculptures, where the fun is in going out and snapping up the subject of each model. You just have to sit through Carlov’s dialogue, place your wager, then pull the lever. Urgh.

And all that for what? A single heart piece and, eventually, a gold medal of Carlov’s face? Sure, fusing all the Kinstones results in a similar reward from Tingle, but at least some of them are required to move the story along.

Don’t worry, I’ll be back to my ‘Mazaal is the best boss in the Zelda series’ foolishness for the 30th anniversary, but, for today at least, let’s spare a thought for the poor child who poured all his shells into this minigame and is still recovering from landing his 24th Helmasaur… it’s me, I am that child.

Do you agree that the Figurine Gallery is a Minish Cap low point, or are the Kinstones still worse for you? Let us know in the following poll and then unleash your anger in the comments below.

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